[Things are still pretty weird between them right now, so Cater isn't going to make a big spectacle out of this. He'll knock on Idia's door and say that there's something there for him whenever he wants it and leave before waiting to see if Idia opens right away or not.
A tin of sweets (which may or may not be regifted) is waiting with a piece of paper attached that's been cut out to look like a classic ticket voucher. It reads: To be Exchanged for One Day at Appl3 Pi Arcade Courtesy of Cater Diamond (who will pay for all expenses but not force his company upon recipient).]
[Another of those dreams. It’s getting worse, more frequent as his stress levels cycle high and his depression deepens. He’s really trying, not wanting to be a burden to the household (mainly because it draws unwanted attention to him), but there’s only so much he can take. Dealing with it himself is mortifying and a strange mix of pleasant and sickening, definitely not worth the effort as indulging isn’t helping to put a stop to the dreams.
So instead he retreats to the kitchen in the middle of the night (after waiting for his heart and other things to settle down) for coffee. He’s absolutely not going back to sleep no matter how much Vil might scold him for needing more rest. Hunched over the table with both hands cupped around the mug, he stares blankly at the steam rising from the too-sweet dark brew.
Why him? He doesn’t need something so trivial, no matter how he felt under the spell of sorcerous sugar. It’s an awful distraction, and with that person of all possible candidates? He’s fully certain this is his personal hell. It’s not like he can ask for advice or, worse yet, relief from the dream’s effects. Even if sating this bizarre curiosity works, how could he face him or anyone else in the house ever again? It’s stupid! He’s stupid for even considering it!
Groaning, Idia slides the mug away and lets his forehead thump onto the table. What more could possibly go wrong with his brain and body?]
[For his own reasons, Cater had also been finding himself staying up later and later more often. After the last Sleepr post, things had started to press at him, making him feel more anxious and uncertain than ever before. It wasn't solely any one person that was inspiring these thoughts, and ultimately he knew it was his own problem to solve...but that didn't stop his mind from wandering to someone specific, anyway.
It was hard not to, when they lived under the same roof. When Cater was aware of just how deliberately they'd been avoiding each other, since that blowup in the hallway.
When the smell of coffee reaches his room, Cater knows who it has to be. Anyone else and Vil wouldn't tolerate the ill-advised caffeine consumption. He knows it would probably be for the best to leave it, to pretend that he has no idea Idia's out and about in the middle of the night...but something tugs him out of bed, anyway. Cater shuffles toward the kitchen like a man possessed, standing for a long moment in the doorway as he watches where Idia sits.
The way the other boy's head was resting against the table, he could easily turn back around without being found out. And he wondered, even now, if making himself known would do more harm than good. But...they couldn't keep dancing around this, right? Not when Cater knew for a fact that Idia was thinking about him. So, steeling himself, he clears his throat to alert Idia to his presence, approaching the table.]
Looks like a recipe for getting no sleep. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you had an all-night dungeon crawl planned.
[Though it's an amicable opening, Cater doesn't put on a false air of cheer. No, he's notably subdued, his arms crossed somewhat defensively in front of his chest.]
[It’s quite the internal dichotomy, that I knew this would happen feeling hitting at the same instant he startles upright with a gasping yelp. Of course it’s Cater, why wouldn’t it be? This is his life, one cosmic mocking laugh after another aimed his way. He’s tempted to turn into a cat and take off, maybe squeeze himself into one of his nearby hiding spots.
Instead, his startled look gradually melts into a much more exhausted one. He shakes his head slowly, drawing the mug closer again to stare into it.]
I’d give anything for a console or computer.
[Maybe that’s why his stupid brain is losing it, he only gets to play at the arcade and sometimes it’s too crowded for him. He misses building and coding too. Sighing, he takes a long swallow of coffee.]
I am, like, actively coming over specifically to interact with you.
[Cater sighs, pulling up a chair at the table. Seriously, he knew Idia was like this, but it was so tiring, to feel like his presence was an active detriment. Even if Idia didn't mean it that way...but honestly, at this point, Cater really didn't know.
So, screw it. He's just gonna ask, point blank.]
What do you think of me?
[He leans back in his seat, watching Idia closely, as if expecting he'll have to use some kind of magic to keep him from turning cat and bolting.]
[That makes Idia freeze. He can feel himself starting to sweat from nerves. Unlike Cater, he wears his emotions clearly on his face all the time, in his body language, in the flames that start to flicker with licks of yellow-green.
And then the question comes, bringing with it crackling and spitting sparks, like wet wood in a campfire. Idia looks suddenly queasy.]
[Cater didn't blame Idia for being uncomfortable--honestly, he didn't want to be having this conversation, either. It would be so easy to throw out a laughing "JK" as if he was just teasing and leave this whole thing behind. But...it had to happen, it really did. So he doesn't back down.]
I'm having a really hard time understanding if you resent me or if you actually want me to be spending time with you. I thought it was the former, so I've been trying to respect your space, but I'm really getting mixed signals. I know communication isn't your strong suit but I can't, like...it's stressful, not knowing where I stand with your or what the right way forward is, to make things better. Nothing's going to get any less awkward if you don't tell me what you're thinking.
[Yeah, he’s definitely sweating now. His skin feels both hot and cold at the same time, a prickly and uncomfortable shell. He doesn’t like this serious Cater, he’d rather put up with frivolous, extroverted CayCay. His throat has gone dry but he doesn’t trust himself to take another drink without making the anxious nausea worse.
Why is this happening now, right after one of those dreams? Did… did Cater hear him one of those nights? Did he know what Idia was doing?? Oh Seven… if that’s what this is about, Idia’s going to die on the spot. Or did somebody tell Cater that he nearly managed to Overblot again even without his magic?
He’s spiraling, this could be from any number of things! Even if it really is only because Idia’s been avoiding him, why bring it up now, when that’s how things were for three years back at NRC?? Is it sharing a smaller house instead of two different dorms? Does Idia need to leave? But Vil will be upset, for some reason the man is protective of him….
Idia hasn’t answered, but the level of internal conflict is blatantly obvious in his features. The increasing green hue of his flames gives his pale skin an even more sickly look. His thoughts flash back to that encounter in the hall, the terrible squeezing pain in his chest and the need to escape clashing against something he doesn’t understand. He shakes his head, not an answer but simply because he’s not sure what to say.]
[Cater sighs as the incredibly uncomfortable silence stretches on between them, a mixture of frustrated and...disappointed. He just wanted this to be easy: Idia either telling him point-blank to never talk to him again so he knew where he stood, or...well, nothing else would really be easy no matter how one looked at it.]
Hey.
[This wasn't working, though, and Cater didn't really know how to try and bring Idia any sort of peace. The usual ways that his charm worked just didn't with Idia. But he can't just sit here staring at him, and he's determined not to leave him alone about this until he has no choice. So, he scoots their chairs a bit closer, and even as he anticipates getting flinched away from, he puts one of his hands on Idia's. Compared to those long, bony fingers, his own skin is soft and warm--even with the mild callouses from his guitar playing.]
No judgment, okay? I promise. Even if you don't have anything coherent banging around in that brilliant brain of yours, anywhere's a good place to start.
[It’s the first time Cater’s touched him since the fateful party. Idia remembers the warmth of those hands, the smoothness of fingertip calluses and soft skin, the gentle pressure of exploration. Cater’s hand is smaller than his but somehow much stronger, definitely far steadier. He remembers where those hands were that night. His brain latches onto the memory, wanting more than pain and sadness.
He can’t, it’s such a bad idea, he wants to pull back and run the way he always does. But the memory unfurls further, lips on his, tracing his neck, leaving a hot bruise. He struggles to swallow the lump in his throat. Cater’s so close, Idia thinks he smells soap and shampoo over the scent of coffee, he remembers burying his fingers in copper-bright hair with the same fragrance.
Something stirs, and Idia suddenly whimpers, slamming his eyes shut. Pink winds through the green fire, some cherry blossom pale and some as bright as dragonfruit, almost red.]
[Cater can't pretend to fully understand what the different colors of Idia's changing flames mean...but he can make some pretty educated guesses based on context clues alone. And he remembered, vividly, the last time he saw Idia's hair turn this color.
And he thinks, for what feels like the millionth time, about Idia's Sleepr entry--and his conversation with Natsume on that post. He squeezes Idia's hand just a bit more tightly, anticipating that what he has to say next might really make Idia want to bolt. But his voice is more gentle than ever.]
I wouldn't laugh at you, if you told me you still think about what happened at the party in December.
[No no no, why is Cater talking like that, so gentle and soft? Something about it zips right down Idia’s spine and raises goosebumps on his arms. It’s almost the same tone he spoke close to Idia’s ear when he asked if they should stop. A little more breathy and it would break him.
The party… he can’t stop thinking about it, waking moments looping back into the dream. Does Cater realize what he’s doing to Idia? Is this what he wants? There’s no shortage of those who want Cater, why should he waste a moment on a bitter, sad, lonely nerd? The reactions he struggled to curb return without a care for his mortification, and as much as he wants to flee he knows he’ll only give everything away if he tries.
[It should have been flattering, to hear someone say that they dreamed about him. To hear Idia say it. And it still was, he supposed, in a sense. But...it was just tragic, too, how broken up he was about it. How desperate he sounded to not be dreaming of him. Like Cater Diamond was a curse on his brain.
Well, clearly, trying to banish him from his subconscious mind wasn't working. The only other thing that made sense to him was to try the opposite: to get him out of his system. Surely, once he actually had him, he'd be satisfied, right? Because no matter what Idia's body wanted, he didn't like him. This was just some repressed physical need that Cater had unlocked. It only made sense that he step up and take responsibility.]
[The moment the words left his mouth, Idia’s face had gone hot. Cater’s casual answer only made it worse. The creeping dread that Cater could see through the table, see Idia’s shameful lack of control, twisted his insides. He wants to yank his hand away, but his body won’t listen, as if it too is tired of them dancing around each other.
He squeezes his thin thighs together, trying to will his unruly libido to chill. It’s not like they could get further than what happened at the party, once Cater got a good look at Idia’s body he’d drop an excuse and GTFO as fast as possible. Nobody could want someone who looks like this.]
… I… I can’t… n— nobody could stomach seeing me n— n— na…
[Cater takes a breath, searching for Idia's other hand, to take both of them in his own and draw his full attention. To try and break through all that static of self-loathing.]
I understand why you wouldn't believe me, but you could really look like absolutely anything and I'd still be just as interested. You're not going to scare me off.
[Not fair, touching both of his hands. Some primitive part of his brain is yelling YES while his rational side agonizes. All this time keeping Cater at a distance, and now it’s crashing down because of mind-altering spells and stupid lingering hormones?]
Y— you’ve got that guy… could have anybody you want… don’t… don’t do this to yourself… don’t have to pretend….
[Why else would Cater be interested in him? He wouldn’t, that’s the answer. This… it has to be pity. Idia doesn’t think Cater’s shallow enough to consider him a conquest. Though if he’s wrong, does it matter?]
[He can’t look. He just… can’t. If he looks, it will be real and he’ll crumble. He’s scared if he goes through with it, he’ll be admitting to something he’s been denying. He’s terrified he’ll enjoy it.]
… don’t know… w— what I’m doing…
[He brags about otome games and knowing the best routes, but this hasn’t been anything like those. He’s lost and helpless. What if he regrets it? What if things become even more awkward?]
[That was never a problem. Cater knew enough for the both of them. Knew all about staving off loneliness with physical escape. So he leans in closer, his voice dropping to a whisper.]
[That whisper and those words go right to Idia’s core. What a dirty move. If Cater keeps this up they’re going to be fooling around on Vil’s kitchen table because Idia won’t want to walk. So he bites his lip and relents with a small nod, hoping this actually brings him some peace of mind. Whatever Cater wants from him in exchange is worth sleeping without those dreams.
His flames are mostly red now, shot with pink. The sickly green has completely faded. Even his eyebrows and the bluish color of his lips and eyelids have shifted, making him look like he’s wearing Heartslabyul’s red eyeliner and rose lipstick.]
[That question earns a slight quirk of Cater's lips. He stands, pulling up Idia with him, whether he liked it or not.]
My room. C'mon.
[He didn't know how far they'd actually be going, here, but...if they wanted to be prepared, that was the best place. Besides, if it didn't go well, better that Idia was able to retreat to a safe, untainted space. So long as Idia doesn't protest, Cater will lead him by the hand all the way to his bedroom and lock the door behind them.]
[Idia hesitates to get up but eventually does, revealing what he was trying to hide: the start of a noticeable bulge in his sweatpants. He avoids Cater’s eyes, red to the tips of his ears. Since when did he become so easy to turn on?? He’s fully expecting a laugh or a sly remark as he shuffles awkwardly along.
The door closing behind them has him jumping slightly, the click of the lock making him gulp. He’s shaking, his free arm wrapping around his chest protectively, but he doesn’t try to pry his other hand away.]
[He does notice, of course--there's no real way not to. But Cater, gentleman that he is, doesn't so much as let his eyes linger. There would be plenty of time for that shortly, anyway. Once they're guaranteed their privacy, Cater pivots his body toward Idia once again and considers him. If this went anything like last time, this would probably escalate surprisingly quickly...but then, Idia wasn't on any kind of inhibition-lowering substance, this time. Cater wasn't totally sure what he should expect.
Either way, Idia looked like he might fall over unexpectedly at any point, so Cater guides him over to the bed and encourages him to sit down beside him, knocking their knees together.]
If you need to stop, I don't want you to forget that you can say so at any time, okay? I won't feel badly about it.
[Stop? He doesn't want to start. Not really. Well, maybe not. He doesn't know. How did he end up here, like this? He's scared of this unknown and what it could do, but existing in this limbo is tearing him apart. Losing his temper in the hall proved that much, when before he could've simply run away and not had dreams that left him a mess physically and mentally.
Sitting on Cater's bed feels surreal, his pulse frantic from the thought that he's going to end up stretched out naked here soon. Will Cater count his ribs, the bumps in his spine? Will he gauge the depth of the hollows of Idia's collar bones? Will there be disgust in his eyes as he tests if his finger and thumb can completely encircle a wrist or a even a bicep? How can Idia's flesh be aching for this so much when there's so little of it?
He doesn't know what to say and still doesn't trust his voice, so he simply nods again. Sitting down means he can squeeze his legs together again, draping one hand over the embarrassing evidence in his lap as if trying to hide it. He wishes he could yell at it and make it stop doing that forever.]
[Cater expected, of course, that he'd be leading this whole thing, but watching Idia sit beside him looking so miserable made him doubt if this wasn't wrong of him. If it wouldn't somehow make things worse when it didn't really feel like things could get worse.
For now, he doesn't pressure Idia to stop hiding himself and his natural physical reactions. He just makes a decision for the both of them, to start where they'd left off before. Without saying anything else, Cater slides a hand around to the back of Idia's neck to pull him gently in toward him and meets him halfway, pressing their lips gently together.]
[Idia nearly panics at the hand on the back of his neck pulling him in, but it only lasts for a couple of seconds before and after Cater’s mouth finds his. He only thinks to close his eyes when being so close proves too much for his fluttering thoughts. He doesn’t pull away, but he only reacts with stillness for a few seconds more as Cater steals his second-ever kiss, too.
And then his body starts to remember.
His heart throbs almost painfully, lips tingling. He doesn’t know what to do, how to kiss properly, he’s going to turn Cater off so badly that any second now the other boy will break away to laugh at him. Whimpering, all he can do is push himself a bit closer, tilting his head slightly so his nose doesn’t get in the way, and wordlessly beg for Cater to show him what he’s missing without magic sweets in his stomach.]
[No talking, right now. No breaking focus. Just gentle, slow movements as he helped Idia fall back into what might feel a little more familiar or comfortable--reminiscent of last time, hopefully without the same sort of forced desperation. His hand slides from the back of his neck and, fingertips sliding against the sharp curve of his jaw. Cater doesn't work to deepen the kiss, expecting that while this still might escalate quickly, it won't be as much of a passionate firestorm as it was at the party. He'd wait until Idia seemed hopefully a bit more relaxed to try anything else.
Finally, his free hand slides over to take one of Idia's again, pulling it away from his lap to knit their fingers together, instead.]
[Oh, this is dangerous. He’d expected Cater to go for it, deeper kisses and bolder touches. This is about satisfying an urge, scratching an itch, getting it out of Idia’s system. But this? The entangled fingers? It’s too close to things he’d prefer to leave unexplained and unexplored. It feeds kindling to the fire that exploded in the hall that night. They should stop. It would be the logical thing to do.
But Idia doesn’t pull back. He’s terrified but he barely parts his lips, giving consent even as the hand in Cater’s trembles. He recalls mouths crushed together, tongues meeting, but that was a different Idia that left his mistakes for this one to fix.]
[It's hard for him to gauge, exactly, how much of this Idia likes or is indifferent to, if he's just nervous because of lack of experience or because its Cater he's doing this with or something else entirely. But then Idia's mouth opens, even if it's just a little. Cater takes the opening he's been given, using his own mouth to widen that gap just a bit further--needing a bit of extra leeway to get safely past those signature teeth.
As soon as he's brave enough to do so, Cater's tongue makes a bold path forward. All he can do is trust that in his nervous state, Idia won't crunch down on him. He lets loose a small sigh, his own skin warming even with the stilted and awkward beginnings of this.]
[Though he’s expecting it, having Cater’s tongue in his mouth still shocks Idia. Thankfully he doesn’t bite down, but he does freeze up for a heartbeat or two. When he finally responds it’s with shy hesitation, the slightest brush of tongue to tongue.
It’s… okay, strange but not unpleasant, though as he tilts his head a bit more to better slot their mouths together, he can’t ignore the twinge in his pants. What was calming down is waking up again, and Idia presses his hand more firmly into his lap. Despite what they’re likely going to do, the thought of Cater seeing that part of him is so mortifying. What if it’s abnormal too, even more so than the rest of him? It’s not like he has much reference outside the confines of fictional bodies in media. Though he knows some things about his body are definitely unlike most people’s, and all he can do is hope Cater isn’t weirded out.]
[It was hard to make full sense of this. Cater wasn't used to needing to plan out his actions to such an extent as he was in the middle of making out with a person. Usually, he just kind of went for it, allowing room for caution and any needs to pause things. This was a much different level of delicate, however. Feeling Idia's body shift, he has a feeling he knows exactly what the other teen is trying to diminish. Should he try not to draw attention for the sake of Idia's comfort, or was it better to just get it out of the way now?
He has no idea what the right move is, but he's worried that the wrong one will turn things ugly.
Might as well test the waters, anyway. The hand on Idia's jaw starts to sink, blazing a trail down his front--but he doesn't go all the way to his lap, instead taking a break to rest at his slim waist. And then his mouth is moving, too, drawing out of their liplock so he can scour kisses down his long neck, instead.]
[The kisses trailing down his neck bring up fevered memories as well, especially as Cater finds the spot where he’d left a mark that night. Idia whimpers again and bites his lip, subconsciously seeking some relief by grinding the heel of his palm against his twitching arousal. Maybe if he’s just rough enough to be unpleasant without pain, the damned thing will lose interest.
But no, it’s not subsiding. If anything, Cater’s attentions are encouraging it. He can feel his pulse in it, a strong and rapid throb that has his breath catching as one of those kisses simultaneously finds a sensitive spot.]
[Each little hint that Idia gives him, however unintentional, Cater capitalizes on. They've officially reached a point where he's willing to be a bit more aggressive, to move things in a specific direction instead of meandering around what it was that the other boy's body was begging for. He bites down gently on that bit of skin that sparked a reaction, and his hand finally comes down the rest of the way. Cater takes Idia's hand by the wrist to pull it away from the erection he's trying to suppress, replacing it with his own once--in a much kinder, gentler movement. His fingers dance over that bump in the soft fabric of his sweatpants before diving beneath to properly size the full length of him.
[Idia shudders at the unexpected bite, thrown off-balance by it enough not to resist his hand being moved away. A confused sound becomes a gasp when he feels fingers that aren’t his tracing his “hidden attribute.” He wasn’t expecting Cater to move so fast, but his body isn’t going to let him say no, fears be damned.
Cater might be getting a surprise of his own. It seems like whatever refused to build up Idia’s body put all its energy into his brain and one other place, because what’s under Cater’s hand… is impressive. The sly joke about men with big hands might have some truth to it after all. Not just long but proportionately girthy, heated where Idia is usually cold, and already leaking, it’s lucky Idia’s pants are so loose to give Cater room to tease it without having to take the garment down.]
[The weight of the rod he's wrapping his fingers around is so surprising Cater nearly pulls back so he can take a good look at it with his own damn eyes. Thankfully, he has the sense to restrain himself, and his only actual indication of surprise is the way his breath puffs out against Idia's neck. This suddenly got much more fun for him--not that it was ever a chore, mind you, but--damn!]
Here, lay back.
[His other hand finally breaks away from where it was locking fingers with Idia's to guide him down against the bed, get him a little more comfortable. Cater was doing his best to temper his own excitement, this new development making him suddenly feel a lot more hot and bothered than he had been.
Listen--he had said Idia could look like anything, but having a huge cock certainly didn't hurt things.]
[Not fighting it but definitely shivering, Idia lets himself be guided. Resting flat on his back makes it even more real, not to mention how the position makes the shocking tent in his pants all the more obvious. Both hands fly to cover his face, the embarrassed flush quickly returning.]
[But he does want to look at it. And, anyway, it would probably be less mortifying not to be actively pitching a tent, right? So cautiously, and without totally pulling off Idia's pants, Cater guides the band of his sweatpants down below his erection, allowing it to pop out properly.]
[Idia jerks as he pops free, standing up almost completely hard. It’s a startling contrast between that impressive erection and the ectomorphic body it’s attached to. The Shroud curse clearly affects more than just Idia’s head: though the flames are more of a simple soft glow at his groin, the color does match the pink and red topside.]
I— I’m trying…!
[His legs are shaking, whether from nerves, arousal, or some combination is impossible to know for certain.]
[Idia all but begged him not to star, but Cater can't help his eyes lingering just a bit more than he intends to. But if Idia's even looking from between splayed fingers, he won't notice any amount of disgust on Cater's face as he takes in the uniquely new sight of Idia's partly exposed body laying on his bed.]
Close your eyes...just focus on how this feels.
[Taking hold of his cock again, Cater begins to stroke it slowly and methodically. This time, it's Idia's face that he watches--what little he can see of it. Right now, all he cared about was seeing the chaotically nervous body beneath him begin to show signs of relaxation. Cater wondered if he should try kissing him again, but that would be hard to get back into, so long as the other teen stayed so guarded.]
[Idia chokes out a muffled noise as his hips jerk upward at Cater’s first stroke. He stiffens further, thickening in Cater’s grip, squirming as the ginger boy works him into a slow boil. He doesn’t uncover his face, hands not quite stifling any of his groans and whines. He’s not loud, but he’s certainly vocal in his growing pleasure.]
A— ah… guh… I… I can’t… hngh…!
[Gradually he starts moving with Cater’s strokes, clumsy but wanting as he chases the sensation. His flames crackle and curl, throwing off rosy light that turns Cater’s room into a den of lust.]
[Idia's skin is so hot and slick in his hand, and his voice is growing so deliciously lewd, Cater has to really be careful not to let his own excitement overtake him. To keep from going any more intense when just this much was having such a desperate effect. He wondered if Idia ever even touched himself at all like this, or just smothered the feeling until it left him. Either way, it was different to have unfamiliar hands fondling you and he knew it.]
Don't fight it, Idia. It's good, right? Just let yourself feel what you're feeling.
[If he came fast, that was fine, too. There was clearly already so much pressure built up under the surface, here. Maybe after he popped off, they could have a more coherent conversation. Or maybe Cater would build him up again and again, as many times as Idia needed, until he finally felt the bliss of emptiness in that out of control hamster wheel of anxiety.]
[He could almost lose himself in this if not for the reminders of that voice and the unfamiliar touch, but those things are fading into the background. He’s touched himself before but very rarely, only when he didn’t have time to wait for things to calm down on their own. It was mechanical and reflexive, little more than relieving a bodily function.
But this? He can’t stop, his whole body is buzzing and his hips thrust and he’s gasping hard. Whatever’s approaching is terrifying in its scope. He might die if he lets this loose. A sob escapes as a strong pulse moves through the flesh in Cater’s hand, drips of slick fluid tempting to a hungry and horny mouth. He’s approaching the edge but still trying to resist because it’s too much.]
[It's clear that Idia's still grappling hard with this--painfully close to tipping over the edge but fighting against it as if his very life depended on it. Cater's eyes flick from face down to the throbbing, leaking rod in his hand. The way he saw it, he had a couple options...but if he just let things ride out the way they were, patiently beating past Idia's resolve, they'd need to do a bit of shameful laundry, wouldn't they?
And he wasn't about to stop what he was doing to fully strip the writhing boy spread out beneath him. So, two birds with one stone: he'd push Idia toward release the same way he'd keep him from making a total mess of himself. Without giving any warning, Cater leans over and slides the tip of Idia's cock into his mouth, letting that wet warmth envelop it as his hand continues to pump the base.]
[Well, that’s 100% new. The moment he feels that wet warmth, Idia shrieks and bucks hard, leaving his eyes uncovered as he slams both hands fully over his mouth. A brief wide-eyed stare at Cater is all it takes for him to realize what’s happening. The rising heat in his nerves cranks up abruptly, his hips squirming, loud groans barely stifled.
He can’t watch anymore, it’s too much for his brain to handle! Yet… he can’t force himself to close his eyes, the sight of Cater’s mouth engulfing him proving weirdly fascinating. He’s seen oral in hentai, but experiencing it himself is totally different. His body moves on its own, clumsily rolling to push against whatever suction Cater applies.]
[When Idia makes such an alarming noise, Cater almost backs up off of him--but that's harder to do when Idia's bucking hips ram that hot cock farther up into his mouth. It's a good thing he's had ample time to work on his gag reflex--even without working that whole rod down his throat, it's a shock to the system to have it go so far unexpectedly.
As he steadies himself, Cater's eyes flick up and meet Idia's. Realizing that he's actually being watched now, his lips curl slightly as he begins to suck properly and in earnest. His free hand press gently down on Idia's abdomen, hoping to hold him a bit more steady, too.
With both his mouth and his eyes, he's all but egging him on. C'mon, Idia. Let yourself go.]
[Panting and whining, Idia can’t help following Cater’s unspoken command. Quicker, more jagged movements, full body tremors, he’s clearly on the brink. His eyes are locked on Cater’s until the moment they roll back as the first throbs of climax start. He lets loose a choked noise with the first few, heels scrambling on the bed and his flames almost blindingly bright.
His thoughts are white noise. Every inch of his lanky body tingles. For maybe the first time in his life (the second, really, after the party), he doesn’t feel perpetually chilled. This release has become his entire world, drowning out all else.
And then it’s done, leaving him crashing back onto the bed feeling floaty and disconnected. For once, his brain is quiet, the perpetual bleakness of the curse silenced for now. He’s softened somewhat in Cater’s mouth but it’s clear where most of his physical endurance lies. Who would’ve imagined this side of Idia? Debauched and exposed beneath Cater, his body has yet to curl into a protective huddle, his legs still spread. Could he be wanting more?]
[Luckily, Cater's been anticipating the release that would inevitably hit. He clamps down when he feels the first spurt of hot liquid against his tongue, hand continuing to stroke Idia through it, massaging out each wave as it splashes into the back of his throat and slides down. The real challenge for most of it is keeping him still, but before long the tension leaks out of Idia's body and Cater feels him relaxing.
Releasing him, Cater swallows what's left, cleaning that slickened head with one final lick before letting him rest. Except...he certainly doesn't look like he's getting any softer, is he? It's not an unwelcome surprise, but Cater's eyebrows still shoot up as he looks from the aggressively throbbing member up to Idia's face.
Oh, he looked out of it.
Cater wasn't sure he wanted to just barrel on forward if Idia wasn't even fully present, mentally. So, he crawls up his body to look down at him face-to-face.]
[Idia’s eyelids are drooping, but he doesn’t look exhausted. He’s actually relaxed, almost boneless. His hands slip from his face and settle on either side of his head. Though he’s indeed a bit out of it he’s still present enough to mumble a sort of answer.]
… so warm… don’t wanna be cold again…
[It might be almost a non sequitur but his feelings are much more clear in how he reaches down to stroke himself lazily, chasing that earlier heat. He’s too horny to be embarrassed right now.]
[When Idia's hands move, Cater can't help but follow them with his eyes. For a moment, all he can do is watch--because Seven, that's so sexy. He feels himself starting to strain against his soft pants. It seemed like Idia was willing to go farther, maybe even eager for it, in his own way. So the question was...]
Do you want to feel me inside you, Idia?
[Who knew if Idia would even think to give him an honest answer--but Cater wasn't sure which would be more comfortable for him: fucking him, or riding him.]
[Idia really doesn’t have enough brainpower at the moment to choose. He’s had both sorts of dreams, made an equal mess and felt identical shame from both. If his logic was currently functioning, he might wonder if his orgasm left him capable of topping, that he might be slowly fading. But it might also think of bottoming as daunting, allowing Cater something more intimate and intrusive.
He can’t choose. So he nods instead without being wholly aware of what he’s asking, only knowing it’s more. Whatever that nod leads to is good, right? It will satisfy that burning need and finally give him peaceful dreams?]
[Not as lucid of an answer as he wanted, but...Cater would take a nod. Of course, he wasn't about to just stick it in. First, Cater leans over farther until he's reaching the nightstand beside the headboard, quickly fetching a small glass vial from inside. Then he leans back on his knees and pulls his pajama shirt up over his head, tossing it somewhere unseen.]
I'm gonna take your pants off--but if you want to keep your shirt on, that's fine.
[It was beyond obvious that Idia had body issues, after all. Cater would've loved to see him fully undressed, but whatever gave Idia any lingering sense of security, he wasn't going to argue against it. With that warning out of the way, he takes hold of Idia's sweatpants once again, this time taking it and his underwear and pulling them fully down the rest of his legs to free them completely.]
[If not for the lingering cottony fuzziness in his brain, Idia would freak at being naked from the waist down in from of someone. As it is, he only whines and squirms more as his hand keeps working. His shirt has rucked up far enough to give a peek at his nipples, small and rosy to match the aroused color of his lips. Odd how his lips changed with his hair…]
[This was all such strange, delicate territory. Cater didn't mind a quick, passionate coupling--and Idia hardly seemed like he wanted to linger on what they were doing. But at the same time, it felt wrong to do this too rushed. Idia's fragile emotional state meant that Cater wanted to be thorough, and his experience so far in that kind of encounter involved a lot more kissing and intimate touching.
It was all...kind of odd. But as Idia laid there looking so sexual, Cater couldn't take his eyes off of him. That was enough to keep him from thinking too hard about it--that, and his own bodily demands. He'd take off his own pants before too much longer, but for now his focus was on Idia and not himself. As his eyes scour Idia's expression and idle self-exploration, he gently parts his legs, inserting himself between them.
Pulling the stopper free from his vial, he coats a couple of his fingers on one hand with the slick liquid inside before setting it aside. A moment later, and Idia would feel those fingers for himself, brushing the puckered skin of his opening. He doesn't push in right away, waiting until Idia seems about as ready as he's possibly going to be before a finger starts to slide inside.]
[Cater’s careful efforts are rewarded with a soft moan, Idia shuddering and pushing toward the intrusion. His hand keeps moving with the same slow pace, a guide for what his body craves at that moment.
He’s not wholly unaware, he knows what this is leading to, but Idia wants it if only to clear this maddening infection from his brain. He craves more of the blissful quiet he felt during and after orgasm. If this ginger menace is the only one willing to give it to him, then so be it. Maybe this will make up for the hallway incident.
Ha, all these random fragments of thought… they’re future Idia’s problem. Right now he’s only concerned with trying not to grind himself on Cater’s hand and ending up hurting something delicate inside himself. ]
[Idia was taking Cater's finger a lot more comfortably than he had expected. Hearing him moan like that was encouraging, and Cater licks his lips as he adds in a second. He mimics that slow and easy pace, focusing his probing thrusts on getting Idia's body used to the sensation, using this more as a precursor to the main event than as a way to properly get him off. Even if he wanted to really explore every inch of him this way, to find all the inner spots that would truly get him going...Cater once again tempered himself.
And as those fingers work inside of the other teen, Cater's other hand finally starts to tug down his own pants, revealing his own eager cock. Hopefully, its overall average size and girth wouldn't prove too intimidating a sight for the overwhelmed introvert.]
[Idia isn’t paying much attention anyway, lost in pleasuring himself to the tempo of Cater’s fingers. He’s tight but not resisting much, only brief clenches now and then. Soft gasps and the occasional moan escape him, thankfully not nearly loud enough to risk alerting the rest of the household.
He’s quickly returning to full mast, long fingers gliding easily over slicked skin. Cater might end up needing to do laundry anyway, but that’s not Idia’s problem. Flushed with renewed arousal and riding his classmate’s fingers, he’s the picture of need. Who knows what he’ll be come morning, but for now he wants everything he can get. Hopefully Cater knocks him out and he has his first restful sleep in months.]
[Ugh, he looks so incredible--softly hued and glowing, his beautiful fingers stroking that big fat cock. Cater wished he could take a picture. Knew, at least, that long after tonight he'd be imagining this.
Sensing that Idia was about as comfortable and ready as he was going to be for this, with the complicated dynamic that the two of them had, Cater removes his fingers. A quick tug and he has his pants completely off, kicking them off the bed, and then he's positioning himself between Idia's legs.
He pauses, then, wondering if he should say something...but as he looks up at Idia, his thoughts are empty outside of desire. He locks eyes with him for a long moment as he strokes himself, spreading lubrication down his own shaft with a shuddering moan of pleasure, and then finally...finally lines himself up with the other boy's opening. As much as he wants to watch every change in Idia's expression, his own eyes flutter closed as he pushes in. He groans even more hotly, his muscles straining as he forces himself not to shove himself the rest of the way when it felt so good--so tight and hot around him.]
[Idia arches with a broken moan as he’s breached, his free hand curling into the sheets as the other reflexively squeezes the base of his erection. It’s so different from fingers, either Cater’s knowing ones or (embarrassingly) his own exploring ones. He’d only tried it twice, desperate for solo relief, but he couldn’t bring himself to go very far out of shame. Now they’re connected in such an intimate way, something Idia had never considered a possibility for him.
Then Cater moves slightly, maybe adjusting position, maybe breathing, and all thought is wiped away a second time. Idia quivers and claws at the sheets, twisting them around his fingers. His other hand starts stroking again, slowly for now, gasps and whines escaping his trembling lips with every motion.]
[Once he's fully buried inside Idia, Cater pauses to make sure that the other boy's not too uncomfortable. He breaths hard as he looks down at his classmate, his hands on either side of the pillow he was laying against, a groan of his own sounding as Idia squirmed. Yeah, he looked like he was into it--if not as an active participant, at least as someone having a very singular experience.
He really, truly, wanted to ask Idia to touch him. Wanted to take over with his hand where Idia was stroking himself and lay their bodies down closer together. But he knew, that kind of intimacy wasn't something that Idia wanted. Cater reminded himself to consider himself more of a service top than a lover, right now. That even if Idia was interested in reciprocating, he probably wasn't capable of it with how overwhelmed he clearly was.
So his head ducks as he focuses instead on what he's doing. Starts to move his hips, finding a slow stride.]
[As weird-pleasurable as being penetrated is, once Cater starts moving it only heightens. For someone so shy Idia becomes more and more vocal, not loud but punctuating every movement with a whimper or groan. His legs wrap around Cater, opening his thighs further. His head tosses back and forth on the pillow, as if he’s denying how good Cater makes him feel.
Even his fevered dreams, sparked by memories of the party and fueled by media-saturated imagination, can’t come close to what it’s really like. He tries to move his hips with Cater’s, awkward in his inexperience and his need to keep stroking himself. His pale skin, flushed with lust, now shines with traces of sweat. His arms might not be clinging but his legs certainly are, pulling Cater back in every time he draws back, demanding more.]
[Feeling Idia's legs clamp around him is just what he needed--a bit more of a reassurance that he's more connected to this than as someone performing an act. Between that and the plaintive noises of pleasure that Idia was making with each thrust, Cater couldn't help wanting to give him everything that he seemed to be begging for without words. Idia's clumsiness only made it all feel more authentic, a real display of physical need.
Cater brings a hand down to guide Idia's hip, angling him slightly so that he could hit just a bit deeper, hoping that each thrust would be punctuated with a graze against his sweet spot.]
[The slight change of angle has Idia letting go of the sheets to slap a hand over his mouth again, not quite in time to stifle all of a shout. At least every subsequent cry he makes after that is muffled, jerking himself off more quickly in time to his racing heart.
So good so very good! He’s hot and melty and for once sweating and exertion isn’t bad at all. If this is a one-time bonus event, then he’s getting the best possible outcome. Even if he doesn’t last long it means he’s going to be a boneless puddle of contentment soon. He jolts each time Cater brushes something inside him, his flesh throbbing in his grip. His legs hold on tight, pulling Cater close. His heart drums madly in his chest, his ears, his aching need.
More! More more more! He’s greedy for it, this consuming heat that washes away his pain.]
[It was growing rapidly more clear now that Idia wasn't interested in going slowly any longer. The way he was touching himself was indication of that enough, if not the rest of his body language.]
Idia...
[After that much louder noise, though, he's definitely more wary of just how far the sound might carry. Vil's one rule had been that any hookups should be respectful of the rest of the house, and Cater isn't about to let that show of good will get stomped on, even if he never intended for Idia to be his hookup. Cater moves Idia's hand off of his mouth so he can capture him in a kiss, instead, before he renews his grip on his bony body so he can rev up the pace further. Now, he's not just hitting deeper but faster, as well.]
[Caught up in the moment, Idia kisses back with an uncharacteristic hunger, faltering only to cry out into Cater’s mouth when a thrust hits just right. The hand that had been over his mouth now slides up Cater’s back to grip a shoulder, pulling the ginger boy closer. Stroking himself is more tricky that way, but the heat of another body pressed to his almost feels better.
The clutch of his legs guides Idia along with Cater’s movements, which is good because he’s aware of that sensation from earlier rushing closer again. If that one was a normal breaker on a beach, this is a rogue wave that promises to leave him breathless and tumbling out of control. He claws at Cater’s back, his nails bitten too short to do more than sting a bit.
It’s coming, he can feel it barreling toward his brain. He breaks the kiss to gasp hard against Cater’s other shoulder. He starts to shake forcefully, limbs jittering, heat swelling and bubbling until it all boils over. At the very last instant, he muffles his scream the only way his addled brain can think to accomplish the task: by sinking those pointed teeth into flesh. He holds on as orgasm rattles him and he paints their bodies with his release, clamping down on Cater mid-thrust. His flames flare wildly, a brilliant red so intense it hurts the eyes for a brief flash.]
[With Idia's mouth on his and his arm grasping him, their bodies more firmly together, Cater was quickly forgetting about any apprehension he had about this. It didn't feel disconnected anymore, just raw need that they were sharing with each other. His own movements grow more desperate the closer Idia gets to release, his breath hot against the other teen's skin as their kiss breaks.
And what happens next is so sharp and abrupt that Cater doesn't even fully register what happened--lets out an unrestrained yelp of pain as his skin is pierced, his hands digging into the bedspread. But even with the pain, Idia holding him so firmly inside and the feeling of wet heat against his stomach causes him to tumble over the edge right along with him. Cater moans again and again, a sound of pleasure mingling with the ache of being latched onto with teeth, wanting nothing more than to crawl his way even deeper inside and lose himself there.]
[Idia trembles though Cater’s climax and his own aftershocks, though mercifully he releases his unfortunate partner from the painful bite as his head finally slumps into the pillow. His long limbs fall away from their hold and sprawl loose, twitching. Splatters of white paint his torso and his eyes are almost closed, his narrow chest heaving for breath. There’s a small smudge of red on his lips and teeth.
[Staring down at Idia and savoring the view, Cater wants nothing more than to collapse down beside him. After all of that, absolutely passing out sounded like the best possible outcome. But the sight of red at Idia's lips makes him much more acutely aware of the pain in his shoulder.
Ah, so that was what happened. And he is definitely still bleeding. Yeah, he couldn't just ignore an open wound.
Wincing, Cater reluctantly pulls himself out of Idia with another groan and stumbles out of bed, blindly grabbing his pants with his good arm so he could shove into them--just in case he ran into anyone in the hallway.]
I gotta--bathroom--BRB.
[Not that he knows if Idia can even register his words, or anything. Cater just didn't want him to feel like he was running away immediately after the deed was done. He'll come back once he's cleaned himself off and applied some of Vil's healing salve to the wound.]
[Sprawled there in the dim light and silence, Idia drifts somewhere between barely awake and asleep. Is he dreaming? He feels sticky and sweaty, sore in places and weird in others, but overall he feels… good. He can smell sex and Cater’s soap, taste something faintly metallic on his teeth.
He… just lost his virginity, didn’t he? All those dreams, and now it really happened. And it was good, very good, better than he’d imagined. Maybe a bit rushed, not romantic or anything, but the melty warmth lingering all over his body is perfect. He knows he should be freaking out but somehow he can’t bring himself to right now. Now he wants to sleep. He really needs to go back to his room, but he feels heavy yet floaty, in no state to move.]
[Really, he should take a shower while he's here...but with Idia likely still in his bed just as sweaty and sticky, Cater decides there's little point. He'll tackle that in the morning, as well as gathering up the bedding for laundry. For now, he just makes sure that the bleeding has stopped and the two crescents of puncture marks are beginning to heal before he makes his way back to the bedroom.
A part of him, admittedly, is a little surprised that Idia didn't leave, but it's not an unwelcome sight, to see him still laying there in a daze. Locking the door behind him again, he pulls the covers back and crawls in beside Idia, nudging him to scoot over enough from the middle so they'll both fit. Cater doesn't make to cuddle him, but just gets comfortable laying by his side, a slight smile on his face. Whether or not Idia decides to face him or the other way is completely his own call.]
Sleep well, Idia.
[The could unpack all of this properly in the morning.]
[Idia doesn’t do either, used to sleeping on his back at the start. At some point he’ll end up on his stomach with his arms tucked under his body and his face smushed into the pillow. He makes a soft sound of acknowledgment, still not lucid enough to really reply. He hasn’t been this exhausted in a long time.
So even though it’s beyond strange to share a bed with Cater Diamond, especially naked, it’s something to unpack later. As his flames finish cooling back to blue and dimming with fatigue, his eyes close and his breathing slows with sleep.]
[It's been quite some time since Cater had kept an alarm to wake him up in the morning. Cami was his new wakeup call--she typically slept at the side of his bed, and jumped up to wake him up personally for her morning routine. With him bringing Idia into his bed, he had apologetically left her to sleep out in the hall...but of course, she wasn't going to let him simply forget about her.
Laying on his side and gazing at Idia's collapsed form, Cater wasn't sure exactly when he fell asleep. But the sound of whining and pawing at the door was enough to rouse him--and not wanting Vil to get upset at any potential scratching to the wood, he tosses himself out of bed as discreetly as he can. It doesn't look like Idia so much as stirs, so he doesn't say anything as he throws on the rest of his pajamas and heads out.
He checks back in once Cami's been taken out and given her breakfast, but if he sees that Idia's still asleep, he'll duck back out to take a shower. After that point, he finally steels himself to wake the boy that was still in his bed; Idia seemed so peaceful that it made him feel a little badly, but...well, he couldn't just leave him in there forever.]
Hey...it's getting pretty late.
[He sits gently on the bed beside him, tempted to run a hand through that softly glowing, flaming hair.]
[Idia makes another soft, peaceful sound and turns over onto his side. His shirt has ridden up almost under his arms again, exposing most of his torso, including those small nipples. Nipples that aren’t rosy anymore but now the same shade of blue as his lips. They certainly weren’t that color during their encounter.]
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timeasmymeasure
12/25 Gift Delivery
Date: 2024-12-27 12:47 am (UTC)A tin of sweets (which may or may not be regifted) is waiting with a piece of paper attached that's been cut out to look like a classic ticket voucher. It reads: To be Exchanged for One Day at Appl3 Pi Arcade Courtesy of Cater Diamond (who will pay for all expenses but not force his company upon recipient).]
NSFW PRIVATE IN PERSON THREAD - BEFORE START OF APRIL 2025 EVENT
Date: 2025-04-16 10:55 pm (UTC)So instead he retreats to the kitchen in the middle of the night (after waiting for his heart and other things to settle down) for coffee. He’s absolutely not going back to sleep no matter how much Vil might scold him for needing more rest. Hunched over the table with both hands cupped around the mug, he stares blankly at the steam rising from the too-sweet dark brew.
Why him? He doesn’t need something so trivial, no matter how he felt under the spell of sorcerous sugar. It’s an awful distraction, and with that person of all possible candidates? He’s fully certain this is his personal hell. It’s not like he can ask for advice or, worse yet, relief from the dream’s effects. Even if sating this bizarre curiosity works, how could he face him or anyone else in the house ever again? It’s stupid! He’s stupid for even considering it!
Groaning, Idia slides the mug away and lets his forehead thump onto the table. What more could possibly go wrong with his brain and body?]
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Date: 2025-04-17 02:20 am (UTC)It was hard not to, when they lived under the same roof. When Cater was aware of just how deliberately they'd been avoiding each other, since that blowup in the hallway.
When the smell of coffee reaches his room, Cater knows who it has to be. Anyone else and Vil wouldn't tolerate the ill-advised caffeine consumption. He knows it would probably be for the best to leave it, to pretend that he has no idea Idia's out and about in the middle of the night...but something tugs him out of bed, anyway. Cater shuffles toward the kitchen like a man possessed, standing for a long moment in the doorway as he watches where Idia sits.
The way the other boy's head was resting against the table, he could easily turn back around without being found out. And he wondered, even now, if making himself known would do more harm than good. But...they couldn't keep dancing around this, right? Not when Cater knew for a fact that Idia was thinking about him. So, steeling himself, he clears his throat to alert Idia to his presence, approaching the table.]
Looks like a recipe for getting no sleep. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you had an all-night dungeon crawl planned.
[Though it's an amicable opening, Cater doesn't put on a false air of cheer. No, he's notably subdued, his arms crossed somewhat defensively in front of his chest.]
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Date: 2025-04-17 02:56 am (UTC)Instead, his startled look gradually melts into a much more exhausted one. He shakes his head slowly, drawing the mug closer again to stare into it.]
I’d give anything for a console or computer.
[Maybe that’s why his stupid brain is losing it, he only gets to play at the arcade and sometimes it’s too crowded for him. He misses building and coding too. Sighing, he takes a long swallow of coffee.]
I’ll be outta your way as soon as I finish this.
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Date: 2025-04-17 03:01 am (UTC)[Cater sighs, pulling up a chair at the table. Seriously, he knew Idia was like this, but it was so tiring, to feel like his presence was an active detriment. Even if Idia didn't mean it that way...but honestly, at this point, Cater really didn't know.
So, screw it. He's just gonna ask, point blank.]
What do you think of me?
[He leans back in his seat, watching Idia closely, as if expecting he'll have to use some kind of magic to keep him from turning cat and bolting.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 03:08 am (UTC)And then the question comes, bringing with it crackling and spitting sparks, like wet wood in a campfire. Idia looks suddenly queasy.]
Wh— what? I… I don’t…
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Date: 2025-04-17 03:15 am (UTC)I'm having a really hard time understanding if you resent me or if you actually want me to be spending time with you. I thought it was the former, so I've been trying to respect your space, but I'm really getting mixed signals. I know communication isn't your strong suit but I can't, like...it's stressful, not knowing where I stand with your or what the right way forward is, to make things better. Nothing's going to get any less awkward if you don't tell me what you're thinking.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 03:32 am (UTC)Why is this happening now, right after one of those dreams? Did… did Cater hear him one of those nights? Did he know what Idia was doing?? Oh Seven… if that’s what this is about, Idia’s going to die on the spot. Or did somebody tell Cater that he nearly managed to Overblot again even without his magic?
He’s spiraling, this could be from any number of things! Even if it really is only because Idia’s been avoiding him, why bring it up now, when that’s how things were for three years back at NRC?? Is it sharing a smaller house instead of two different dorms? Does Idia need to leave? But Vil will be upset, for some reason the man is protective of him….
Idia hasn’t answered, but the level of internal conflict is blatantly obvious in his features. The increasing green hue of his flames gives his pale skin an even more sickly look. His thoughts flash back to that encounter in the hall, the terrible squeezing pain in his chest and the need to escape clashing against something he doesn’t understand. He shakes his head, not an answer but simply because he’s not sure what to say.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 03:39 am (UTC)Hey.
[This wasn't working, though, and Cater didn't really know how to try and bring Idia any sort of peace. The usual ways that his charm worked just didn't with Idia. But he can't just sit here staring at him, and he's determined not to leave him alone about this until he has no choice. So, he scoots their chairs a bit closer, and even as he anticipates getting flinched away from, he puts one of his hands on Idia's. Compared to those long, bony fingers, his own skin is soft and warm--even with the mild callouses from his guitar playing.]
No judgment, okay? I promise. Even if you don't have anything coherent banging around in that brilliant brain of yours, anywhere's a good place to start.
[Because clearly, clearly, it wasn't nothing.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:06 am (UTC)He can’t, it’s such a bad idea, he wants to pull back and run the way he always does. But the memory unfurls further, lips on his, tracing his neck, leaving a hot bruise. He struggles to swallow the lump in his throat. Cater’s so close, Idia thinks he smells soap and shampoo over the scent of coffee, he remembers burying his fingers in copper-bright hair with the same fragrance.
Something stirs, and Idia suddenly whimpers, slamming his eyes shut. Pink winds through the green fire, some cherry blossom pale and some as bright as dragonfruit, almost red.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:22 am (UTC)And he thinks, for what feels like the millionth time, about Idia's Sleepr entry--and his conversation with Natsume on that post. He squeezes Idia's hand just a bit more tightly, anticipating that what he has to say next might really make Idia want to bolt. But his voice is more gentle than ever.]
I wouldn't laugh at you, if you told me you still think about what happened at the party in December.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:35 am (UTC)The party… he can’t stop thinking about it, waking moments looping back into the dream. Does Cater realize what he’s doing to Idia? Is this what he wants? There’s no shortage of those who want Cater, why should he waste a moment on a bitter, sad, lonely nerd? The reactions he struggled to curb return without a care for his mortification, and as much as he wants to flee he knows he’ll only give everything away if he tries.
And then his mouth betrays him anyway.]
I— I can’t stop the dreams…!
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:40 am (UTC)Well, clearly, trying to banish him from his subconscious mind wasn't working. The only other thing that made sense to him was to try the opposite: to get him out of his system. Surely, once he actually had him, he'd be satisfied, right? Because no matter what Idia's body wanted, he didn't like him. This was just some repressed physical need that Cater had unlocked. It only made sense that he step up and take responsibility.]
So...don't let them be dreams.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:52 am (UTC)He squeezes his thin thighs together, trying to will his unruly libido to chill. It’s not like they could get further than what happened at the party, once Cater got a good look at Idia’s body he’d drop an excuse and GTFO as fast as possible. Nobody could want someone who looks like this.]
… I… I can’t… n— nobody could stomach seeing me n— n— na…
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:00 am (UTC)[Cater takes a breath, searching for Idia's other hand, to take both of them in his own and draw his full attention. To try and break through all that static of self-loathing.]
I understand why you wouldn't believe me, but you could really look like absolutely anything and I'd still be just as interested. You're not going to scare me off.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:09 am (UTC)Y— you’ve got that guy… could have anybody you want… don’t… don’t do this to yourself… don’t have to pretend….
[Why else would Cater be interested in him? He wouldn’t, that’s the answer. This… it has to be pity. Idia doesn’t think Cater’s shallow enough to consider him a conquest. Though if he’s wrong, does it matter?]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:13 am (UTC)You are giving me way too much credit. I'm not some mega celebrity or prince. I'm just a guy. But just--look at me.
[He shifts to try and put himself directly in Idia's dodging line of sight.]
Do I really look like I'm pretending, right now?
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:24 am (UTC)… don’t know… w— what I’m doing…
[He brags about otome games and knowing the best routes, but this hasn’t been anything like those. He’s lost and helpless. What if he regrets it? What if things become even more awkward?]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:31 am (UTC)[That was never a problem. Cater knew enough for the both of them. Knew all about staving off loneliness with physical escape. So he leans in closer, his voice dropping to a whisper.]
You just need to give yourself permission.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:42 am (UTC)His flames are mostly red now, shot with pink. The sickly green has completely faded. Even his eyebrows and the bluish color of his lips and eyelids have shifted, making him look like he’s wearing Heartslabyul’s red eyeliner and rose lipstick.]
… Wh— where…?
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:49 am (UTC)My room. C'mon.
[He didn't know how far they'd actually be going, here, but...if they wanted to be prepared, that was the best place. Besides, if it didn't go well, better that Idia was able to retreat to a safe, untainted space. So long as Idia doesn't protest, Cater will lead him by the hand all the way to his bedroom and lock the door behind them.]
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Date: 2025-04-17 05:57 am (UTC)The door closing behind them has him jumping slightly, the click of the lock making him gulp. He’s shaking, his free arm wrapping around his chest protectively, but he doesn’t try to pry his other hand away.]
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Date: 2025-04-17 07:46 am (UTC)Either way, Idia looked like he might fall over unexpectedly at any point, so Cater guides him over to the bed and encourages him to sit down beside him, knocking their knees together.]
If you need to stop, I don't want you to forget that you can say so at any time, okay? I won't feel badly about it.
cw: body image issues
Date: 2025-04-17 03:12 pm (UTC)Sitting on Cater's bed feels surreal, his pulse frantic from the thought that he's going to end up stretched out naked here soon. Will Cater count his ribs, the bumps in his spine? Will he gauge the depth of the hollows of Idia's collar bones? Will there be disgust in his eyes as he tests if his finger and thumb can completely encircle a wrist or a even a bicep? How can Idia's flesh be aching for this so much when there's so little of it?
He doesn't know what to say and still doesn't trust his voice, so he simply nods again. Sitting down means he can squeeze his legs together again, draping one hand over the embarrassing evidence in his lap as if trying to hide it. He wishes he could yell at it and make it stop doing that forever.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 12:19 am (UTC)For now, he doesn't pressure Idia to stop hiding himself and his natural physical reactions. He just makes a decision for the both of them, to start where they'd left off before. Without saying anything else, Cater slides a hand around to the back of Idia's neck to pull him gently in toward him and meets him halfway, pressing their lips gently together.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 02:14 am (UTC)And then his body starts to remember.
His heart throbs almost painfully, lips tingling. He doesn’t know what to do, how to kiss properly, he’s going to turn Cater off so badly that any second now the other boy will break away to laugh at him. Whimpering, all he can do is push himself a bit closer, tilting his head slightly so his nose doesn’t get in the way, and wordlessly beg for Cater to show him what he’s missing without magic sweets in his stomach.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 03:51 am (UTC)Finally, his free hand slides over to take one of Idia's again, pulling it away from his lap to knit their fingers together, instead.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 04:03 am (UTC)But Idia doesn’t pull back. He’s terrified but he barely parts his lips, giving consent even as the hand in Cater’s trembles. He recalls mouths crushed together, tongues meeting, but that was a different Idia that left his mistakes for this one to fix.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 04:17 am (UTC)As soon as he's brave enough to do so, Cater's tongue makes a bold path forward. All he can do is trust that in his nervous state, Idia won't crunch down on him. He lets loose a small sigh, his own skin warming even with the stilted and awkward beginnings of this.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 04:32 am (UTC)It’s… okay, strange but not unpleasant, though as he tilts his head a bit more to better slot their mouths together, he can’t ignore the twinge in his pants. What was calming down is waking up again, and Idia presses his hand more firmly into his lap. Despite what they’re likely going to do, the thought of Cater seeing that part of him is so mortifying. What if it’s abnormal too, even more so than the rest of him? It’s not like he has much reference outside the confines of fictional bodies in media. Though he knows some things about his body are definitely unlike most people’s, and all he can do is hope Cater isn’t weirded out.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 04:42 am (UTC)He has no idea what the right move is, but he's worried that the wrong one will turn things ugly.
Might as well test the waters, anyway. The hand on Idia's jaw starts to sink, blazing a trail down his front--but he doesn't go all the way to his lap, instead taking a break to rest at his slim waist. And then his mouth is moving, too, drawing out of their liplock so he can scour kisses down his long neck, instead.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 05:03 am (UTC)But no, it’s not subsiding. If anything, Cater’s attentions are encouraging it. He can feel his pulse in it, a strong and rapid throb that has his breath catching as one of those kisses simultaneously finds a sensitive spot.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 05:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-04-18 05:34 am (UTC)Cater might be getting a surprise of his own. It seems like whatever refused to build up Idia’s body put all its energy into his brain and one other place, because what’s under Cater’s hand… is impressive. The sly joke about men with big hands might have some truth to it after all. Not just long but proportionately girthy, heated where Idia is usually cold, and already leaking, it’s lucky Idia’s pants are so loose to give Cater room to tease it without having to take the garment down.]
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Date: 2025-04-18 05:47 am (UTC)Here, lay back.
[His other hand finally breaks away from where it was locking fingers with Idia's to guide him down against the bed, get him a little more comfortable. Cater was doing his best to temper his own excitement, this new development making him suddenly feel a lot more hot and bothered than he had been.
Listen--he had said Idia could look like anything, but having a huge cock certainly didn't hurt things.]
(Thank you canon for giving us Big Hands Idia & society for the stereotype XD)
Date: 2025-04-18 06:00 am (UTC)D— don’t s— stare!
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Date: 2025-04-18 06:08 am (UTC)[But he does want to look at it. And, anyway, it would probably be less mortifying not to be actively pitching a tent, right? So cautiously, and without totally pulling off Idia's pants, Cater guides the band of his sweatpants down below his erection, allowing it to pop out properly.]
Just try and relax.
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Date: 2025-04-18 06:21 am (UTC)I— I’m trying…!
[His legs are shaking, whether from nerves, arousal, or some combination is impossible to know for certain.]
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Date: 2025-04-19 01:34 am (UTC)Close your eyes...just focus on how this feels.
[Taking hold of his cock again, Cater begins to stroke it slowly and methodically. This time, it's Idia's face that he watches--what little he can see of it. Right now, all he cared about was seeing the chaotically nervous body beneath him begin to show signs of relaxation. Cater wondered if he should try kissing him again, but that would be hard to get back into, so long as the other teen stayed so guarded.]
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Date: 2025-04-19 02:00 am (UTC)[Idia chokes out a muffled noise as his hips jerk upward at Cater’s first stroke. He stiffens further, thickening in Cater’s grip, squirming as the ginger boy works him into a slow boil. He doesn’t uncover his face, hands not quite stifling any of his groans and whines. He’s not loud, but he’s certainly vocal in his growing pleasure.]
A— ah… guh… I… I can’t… hngh…!
[Gradually he starts moving with Cater’s strokes, clumsy but wanting as he chases the sensation. His flames crackle and curl, throwing off rosy light that turns Cater’s room into a den of lust.]
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Date: 2025-04-19 02:08 am (UTC)Don't fight it, Idia. It's good, right? Just let yourself feel what you're feeling.
[If he came fast, that was fine, too. There was clearly already so much pressure built up under the surface, here. Maybe after he popped off, they could have a more coherent conversation. Or maybe Cater would build him up again and again, as many times as Idia needed, until he finally felt the bliss of emptiness in that out of control hamster wheel of anxiety.]
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Date: 2025-04-19 02:25 am (UTC)But this? He can’t stop, his whole body is buzzing and his hips thrust and he’s gasping hard. Whatever’s approaching is terrifying in its scope. He might die if he lets this loose. A sob escapes as a strong pulse moves through the flesh in Cater’s hand, drips of slick fluid tempting to a hungry and horny mouth. He’s approaching the edge but still trying to resist because it’s too much.]
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Date: 2025-04-19 02:36 am (UTC)And he wasn't about to stop what he was doing to fully strip the writhing boy spread out beneath him. So, two birds with one stone: he'd push Idia toward release the same way he'd keep him from making a total mess of himself. Without giving any warning, Cater leans over and slides the tip of Idia's cock into his mouth, letting that wet warmth envelop it as his hand continues to pump the base.]
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Date: 2025-04-19 05:16 pm (UTC)He can’t watch anymore, it’s too much for his brain to handle! Yet… he can’t force himself to close his eyes, the sight of Cater’s mouth engulfing him proving weirdly fascinating. He’s seen oral in hentai, but experiencing it himself is totally different. His body moves on its own, clumsily rolling to push against whatever suction Cater applies.]
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Date: 2025-04-20 12:45 am (UTC)As he steadies himself, Cater's eyes flick up and meet Idia's. Realizing that he's actually being watched now, his lips curl slightly as he begins to suck properly and in earnest. His free hand press gently down on Idia's abdomen, hoping to hold him a bit more steady, too.
With both his mouth and his eyes, he's all but egging him on. C'mon, Idia. Let yourself go.]
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Date: 2025-04-20 01:15 am (UTC)His thoughts are white noise. Every inch of his lanky body tingles. For maybe the first time in his life (the second, really, after the party), he doesn’t feel perpetually chilled. This release has become his entire world, drowning out all else.
And then it’s done, leaving him crashing back onto the bed feeling floaty and disconnected. For once, his brain is quiet, the perpetual bleakness of the curse silenced for now. He’s softened somewhat in Cater’s mouth but it’s clear where most of his physical endurance lies. Who would’ve imagined this side of Idia? Debauched and exposed beneath Cater, his body has yet to curl into a protective huddle, his legs still spread. Could he be wanting more?]
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Date: 2025-04-20 01:31 am (UTC)Releasing him, Cater swallows what's left, cleaning that slickened head with one final lick before letting him rest. Except...he certainly doesn't look like he's getting any softer, is he? It's not an unwelcome surprise, but Cater's eyebrows still shoot up as he looks from the aggressively throbbing member up to Idia's face.
Oh, he looked out of it.
Cater wasn't sure he wanted to just barrel on forward if Idia wasn't even fully present, mentally. So, he crawls up his body to look down at him face-to-face.]
Are you satisfied?
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Date: 2025-04-20 01:55 am (UTC)… so warm… don’t wanna be cold again…
[It might be almost a non sequitur but his feelings are much more clear in how he reaches down to stroke himself lazily, chasing that earlier heat. He’s too horny to be embarrassed right now.]
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Date: 2025-04-20 01:59 am (UTC)Do you want to feel me inside you, Idia?
[Who knew if Idia would even think to give him an honest answer--but Cater wasn't sure which would be more comfortable for him: fucking him, or riding him.]
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Date: 2025-04-20 02:19 am (UTC)He can’t choose. So he nods instead without being wholly aware of what he’s asking, only knowing it’s more. Whatever that nod leads to is good, right? It will satisfy that burning need and finally give him peaceful dreams?]
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Date: 2025-04-20 02:29 am (UTC)I'm gonna take your pants off--but if you want to keep your shirt on, that's fine.
[It was beyond obvious that Idia had body issues, after all. Cater would've loved to see him fully undressed, but whatever gave Idia any lingering sense of security, he wasn't going to argue against it. With that warning out of the way, he takes hold of Idia's sweatpants once again, this time taking it and his underwear and pulling them fully down the rest of his legs to free them completely.]
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Date: 2025-04-20 02:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-04-20 02:54 am (UTC)It was all...kind of odd. But as Idia laid there looking so sexual, Cater couldn't take his eyes off of him. That was enough to keep him from thinking too hard about it--that, and his own bodily demands. He'd take off his own pants before too much longer, but for now his focus was on Idia and not himself. As his eyes scour Idia's expression and idle self-exploration, he gently parts his legs, inserting himself between them.
Pulling the stopper free from his vial, he coats a couple of his fingers on one hand with the slick liquid inside before setting it aside. A moment later, and Idia would feel those fingers for himself, brushing the puckered skin of his opening. He doesn't push in right away, waiting until Idia seems about as ready as he's possibly going to be before a finger starts to slide inside.]
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Date: 2025-04-20 03:18 am (UTC)He’s not wholly unaware, he knows what this is leading to, but Idia wants it if only to clear this maddening infection from his brain. He craves more of the blissful quiet he felt during and after orgasm. If this ginger menace is the only one willing to give it to him, then so be it. Maybe this will make up for the hallway incident.
Ha, all these random fragments of thought… they’re future Idia’s problem. Right now he’s only concerned with trying not to grind himself on Cater’s hand and ending up hurting something delicate inside himself. ]
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Date: 2025-04-20 03:39 am (UTC)And as those fingers work inside of the other teen, Cater's other hand finally starts to tug down his own pants, revealing his own eager cock. Hopefully, its overall average size and girth wouldn't prove too intimidating a sight for the overwhelmed introvert.]
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Date: 2025-04-20 04:06 am (UTC)He’s quickly returning to full mast, long fingers gliding easily over slicked skin. Cater might end up needing to do laundry anyway, but that’s not Idia’s problem. Flushed with renewed arousal and riding his classmate’s fingers, he’s the picture of need. Who knows what he’ll be come morning, but for now he wants everything he can get. Hopefully Cater knocks him out and he has his first restful sleep in months.]
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Date: 2025-04-20 04:17 am (UTC)Sensing that Idia was about as comfortable and ready as he was going to be for this, with the complicated dynamic that the two of them had, Cater removes his fingers. A quick tug and he has his pants completely off, kicking them off the bed, and then he's positioning himself between Idia's legs.
He pauses, then, wondering if he should say something...but as he looks up at Idia, his thoughts are empty outside of desire. He locks eyes with him for a long moment as he strokes himself, spreading lubrication down his own shaft with a shuddering moan of pleasure, and then finally...finally lines himself up with the other boy's opening. As much as he wants to watch every change in Idia's expression, his own eyes flutter closed as he pushes in. He groans even more hotly, his muscles straining as he forces himself not to shove himself the rest of the way when it felt so good--so tight and hot around him.]
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Date: 2025-04-20 07:39 pm (UTC)Then Cater moves slightly, maybe adjusting position, maybe breathing, and all thought is wiped away a second time. Idia quivers and claws at the sheets, twisting them around his fingers. His other hand starts stroking again, slowly for now, gasps and whines escaping his trembling lips with every motion.]
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Date: 2025-04-21 04:17 am (UTC)He really, truly, wanted to ask Idia to touch him. Wanted to take over with his hand where Idia was stroking himself and lay their bodies down closer together. But he knew, that kind of intimacy wasn't something that Idia wanted. Cater reminded himself to consider himself more of a service top than a lover, right now. That even if Idia was interested in reciprocating, he probably wasn't capable of it with how overwhelmed he clearly was.
So his head ducks as he focuses instead on what he's doing. Starts to move his hips, finding a slow stride.]
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Date: 2025-04-21 10:31 pm (UTC)Even his fevered dreams, sparked by memories of the party and fueled by media-saturated imagination, can’t come close to what it’s really like. He tries to move his hips with Cater’s, awkward in his inexperience and his need to keep stroking himself. His pale skin, flushed with lust, now shines with traces of sweat. His arms might not be clinging but his legs certainly are, pulling Cater back in every time he draws back, demanding more.]
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Date: 2025-04-22 02:49 am (UTC)Cater brings a hand down to guide Idia's hip, angling him slightly so that he could hit just a bit deeper, hoping that each thrust would be punctuated with a graze against his sweet spot.]
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Date: 2025-04-22 03:11 am (UTC)So good so very good! He’s hot and melty and for once sweating and exertion isn’t bad at all. If this is a one-time bonus event, then he’s getting the best possible outcome. Even if he doesn’t last long it means he’s going to be a boneless puddle of contentment soon. He jolts each time Cater brushes something inside him, his flesh throbbing in his grip. His legs hold on tight, pulling Cater close. His heart drums madly in his chest, his ears, his aching need.
More! More more more! He’s greedy for it, this consuming heat that washes away his pain.]
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Date: 2025-04-22 03:35 am (UTC)Idia...
[After that much louder noise, though, he's definitely more wary of just how far the sound might carry. Vil's one rule had been that any hookups should be respectful of the rest of the house, and Cater isn't about to let that show of good will get stomped on, even if he never intended for Idia to be his hookup. Cater moves Idia's hand off of his mouth so he can capture him in a kiss, instead, before he renews his grip on his bony body so he can rev up the pace further. Now, he's not just hitting deeper but faster, as well.]
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Date: 2025-04-23 01:28 am (UTC)The clutch of his legs guides Idia along with Cater’s movements, which is good because he’s aware of that sensation from earlier rushing closer again. If that one was a normal breaker on a beach, this is a rogue wave that promises to leave him breathless and tumbling out of control. He claws at Cater’s back, his nails bitten too short to do more than sting a bit.
It’s coming, he can feel it barreling toward his brain. He breaks the kiss to gasp hard against Cater’s other shoulder. He starts to shake forcefully, limbs jittering, heat swelling and bubbling until it all boils over. At the very last instant, he muffles his scream the only way his addled brain can think to accomplish the task: by sinking those pointed teeth into flesh. He holds on as orgasm rattles him and he paints their bodies with his release, clamping down on Cater mid-thrust. His flames flare wildly, a brilliant red so intense it hurts the eyes for a brief flash.]
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Date: 2025-04-23 02:21 am (UTC)And what happens next is so sharp and abrupt that Cater doesn't even fully register what happened--lets out an unrestrained yelp of pain as his skin is pierced, his hands digging into the bedspread. But even with the pain, Idia holding him so firmly inside and the feeling of wet heat against his stomach causes him to tumble over the edge right along with him. Cater moans again and again, a sound of pleasure mingling with the ache of being latched onto with teeth, wanting nothing more than to crawl his way even deeper inside and lose himself there.]
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Date: 2025-04-23 02:59 am (UTC)He looks utterly wrecked.]
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Date: 2025-04-23 03:12 am (UTC)Ah, so that was what happened. And he is definitely still bleeding. Yeah, he couldn't just ignore an open wound.
Wincing, Cater reluctantly pulls himself out of Idia with another groan and stumbles out of bed, blindly grabbing his pants with his good arm so he could shove into them--just in case he ran into anyone in the hallway.]
I gotta--bathroom--BRB.
[Not that he knows if Idia can even register his words, or anything. Cater just didn't want him to feel like he was running away immediately after the deed was done. He'll come back once he's cleaned himself off and applied some of Vil's healing salve to the wound.]
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Date: 2025-04-23 03:27 am (UTC)He… just lost his virginity, didn’t he? All those dreams, and now it really happened. And it was good, very good, better than he’d imagined. Maybe a bit rushed, not romantic or anything, but the melty warmth lingering all over his body is perfect. He knows he should be freaking out but somehow he can’t bring himself to right now. Now he wants to sleep. He really needs to go back to his room, but he feels heavy yet floaty, in no state to move.]
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Date: 2025-04-23 03:42 am (UTC)A part of him, admittedly, is a little surprised that Idia didn't leave, but it's not an unwelcome sight, to see him still laying there in a daze. Locking the door behind him again, he pulls the covers back and crawls in beside Idia, nudging him to scoot over enough from the middle so they'll both fit. Cater doesn't make to cuddle him, but just gets comfortable laying by his side, a slight smile on his face. Whether or not Idia decides to face him or the other way is completely his own call.]
Sleep well, Idia.
[The could unpack all of this properly in the morning.]
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Date: 2025-04-23 03:56 am (UTC)So even though it’s beyond strange to share a bed with Cater Diamond, especially naked, it’s something to unpack later. As his flames finish cooling back to blue and dimming with fatigue, his eyes close and his breathing slows with sleep.]
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Date: 2025-04-24 06:59 am (UTC)Laying on his side and gazing at Idia's collapsed form, Cater wasn't sure exactly when he fell asleep. But the sound of whining and pawing at the door was enough to rouse him--and not wanting Vil to get upset at any potential scratching to the wood, he tosses himself out of bed as discreetly as he can. It doesn't look like Idia so much as stirs, so he doesn't say anything as he throws on the rest of his pajamas and heads out.
He checks back in once Cami's been taken out and given her breakfast, but if he sees that Idia's still asleep, he'll duck back out to take a shower. After that point, he finally steels himself to wake the boy that was still in his bed; Idia seemed so peaceful that it made him feel a little badly, but...well, he couldn't just leave him in there forever.]
Hey...it's getting pretty late.
[He sits gently on the bed beside him, tempted to run a hand through that softly glowing, flaming hair.]
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Date: 2025-06-08 03:15 pm (UTC)