[Things are still pretty weird between them right now, so Cater isn't going to make a big spectacle out of this. He'll knock on Idia's door and say that there's something there for him whenever he wants it and leave before waiting to see if Idia opens right away or not.
A tin of sweets (which may or may not be regifted) is waiting with a piece of paper attached that's been cut out to look like a classic ticket voucher. It reads: To be Exchanged for One Day at Appl3 Pi Arcade Courtesy of Cater Diamond (who will pay for all expenses but not force his company upon recipient).]
[Another of those dreams. It’s getting worse, more frequent as his stress levels cycle high and his depression deepens. He’s really trying, not wanting to be a burden to the household (mainly because it draws unwanted attention to him), but there’s only so much he can take. Dealing with it himself is mortifying and a strange mix of pleasant and sickening, definitely not worth the effort as indulging isn’t helping to put a stop to the dreams.
So instead he retreats to the kitchen in the middle of the night (after waiting for his heart and other things to settle down) for coffee. He’s absolutely not going back to sleep no matter how much Vil might scold him for needing more rest. Hunched over the table with both hands cupped around the mug, he stares blankly at the steam rising from the too-sweet dark brew.
Why him? He doesn’t need something so trivial, no matter how he felt under the spell of sorcerous sugar. It’s an awful distraction, and with that person of all possible candidates? He’s fully certain this is his personal hell. It’s not like he can ask for advice or, worse yet, relief from the dream’s effects. Even if sating this bizarre curiosity works, how could he face him or anyone else in the house ever again? It’s stupid! He’s stupid for even considering it!
Groaning, Idia slides the mug away and lets his forehead thump onto the table. What more could possibly go wrong with his brain and body?]
[For his own reasons, Cater had also been finding himself staying up later and later more often. After the last Sleepr post, things had started to press at him, making him feel more anxious and uncertain than ever before. It wasn't solely any one person that was inspiring these thoughts, and ultimately he knew it was his own problem to solve...but that didn't stop his mind from wandering to someone specific, anyway.
It was hard not to, when they lived under the same roof. When Cater was aware of just how deliberately they'd been avoiding each other, since that blowup in the hallway.
When the smell of coffee reaches his room, Cater knows who it has to be. Anyone else and Vil wouldn't tolerate the ill-advised caffeine consumption. He knows it would probably be for the best to leave it, to pretend that he has no idea Idia's out and about in the middle of the night...but something tugs him out of bed, anyway. Cater shuffles toward the kitchen like a man possessed, standing for a long moment in the doorway as he watches where Idia sits.
The way the other boy's head was resting against the table, he could easily turn back around without being found out. And he wondered, even now, if making himself known would do more harm than good. But...they couldn't keep dancing around this, right? Not when Cater knew for a fact that Idia was thinking about him. So, steeling himself, he clears his throat to alert Idia to his presence, approaching the table.]
Looks like a recipe for getting no sleep. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you had an all-night dungeon crawl planned.
[Though it's an amicable opening, Cater doesn't put on a false air of cheer. No, he's notably subdued, his arms crossed somewhat defensively in front of his chest.]
[It’s quite the internal dichotomy, that I knew this would happen feeling hitting at the same instant he startles upright with a gasping yelp. Of course it’s Cater, why wouldn’t it be? This is his life, one cosmic mocking laugh after another aimed his way. He’s tempted to turn into a cat and take off, maybe squeeze himself into one of his nearby hiding spots.
Instead, his startled look gradually melts into a much more exhausted one. He shakes his head slowly, drawing the mug closer again to stare into it.]
I’d give anything for a console or computer.
[Maybe that’s why his stupid brain is losing it, he only gets to play at the arcade and sometimes it’s too crowded for him. He misses building and coding too. Sighing, he takes a long swallow of coffee.]
I am, like, actively coming over specifically to interact with you.
[Cater sighs, pulling up a chair at the table. Seriously, he knew Idia was like this, but it was so tiring, to feel like his presence was an active detriment. Even if Idia didn't mean it that way...but honestly, at this point, Cater really didn't know.
So, screw it. He's just gonna ask, point blank.]
What do you think of me?
[He leans back in his seat, watching Idia closely, as if expecting he'll have to use some kind of magic to keep him from turning cat and bolting.]
[That makes Idia freeze. He can feel himself starting to sweat from nerves. Unlike Cater, he wears his emotions clearly on his face all the time, in his body language, in the flames that start to flicker with licks of yellow-green.
And then the question comes, bringing with it crackling and spitting sparks, like wet wood in a campfire. Idia looks suddenly queasy.]
[Cater didn't blame Idia for being uncomfortable--honestly, he didn't want to be having this conversation, either. It would be so easy to throw out a laughing "JK" as if he was just teasing and leave this whole thing behind. But...it had to happen, it really did. So he doesn't back down.]
I'm having a really hard time understanding if you resent me or if you actually want me to be spending time with you. I thought it was the former, so I've been trying to respect your space, but I'm really getting mixed signals. I know communication isn't your strong suit but I can't, like...it's stressful, not knowing where I stand with your or what the right way forward is, to make things better. Nothing's going to get any less awkward if you don't tell me what you're thinking.
[Yeah, he’s definitely sweating now. His skin feels both hot and cold at the same time, a prickly and uncomfortable shell. He doesn’t like this serious Cater, he’d rather put up with frivolous, extroverted CayCay. His throat has gone dry but he doesn’t trust himself to take another drink without making the anxious nausea worse.
Why is this happening now, right after one of those dreams? Did… did Cater hear him one of those nights? Did he know what Idia was doing?? Oh Seven… if that’s what this is about, Idia’s going to die on the spot. Or did somebody tell Cater that he nearly managed to Overblot again even without his magic?
He’s spiraling, this could be from any number of things! Even if it really is only because Idia’s been avoiding him, why bring it up now, when that’s how things were for three years back at NRC?? Is it sharing a smaller house instead of two different dorms? Does Idia need to leave? But Vil will be upset, for some reason the man is protective of him….
Idia hasn’t answered, but the level of internal conflict is blatantly obvious in his features. The increasing green hue of his flames gives his pale skin an even more sickly look. His thoughts flash back to that encounter in the hall, the terrible squeezing pain in his chest and the need to escape clashing against something he doesn’t understand. He shakes his head, not an answer but simply because he’s not sure what to say.]
[Cater sighs as the incredibly uncomfortable silence stretches on between them, a mixture of frustrated and...disappointed. He just wanted this to be easy: Idia either telling him point-blank to never talk to him again so he knew where he stood, or...well, nothing else would really be easy no matter how one looked at it.]
Hey.
[This wasn't working, though, and Cater didn't really know how to try and bring Idia any sort of peace. The usual ways that his charm worked just didn't with Idia. But he can't just sit here staring at him, and he's determined not to leave him alone about this until he has no choice. So, he scoots their chairs a bit closer, and even as he anticipates getting flinched away from, he puts one of his hands on Idia's. Compared to those long, bony fingers, his own skin is soft and warm--even with the mild callouses from his guitar playing.]
No judgment, okay? I promise. Even if you don't have anything coherent banging around in that brilliant brain of yours, anywhere's a good place to start.
[It’s the first time Cater’s touched him since the fateful party. Idia remembers the warmth of those hands, the smoothness of fingertip calluses and soft skin, the gentle pressure of exploration. Cater’s hand is smaller than his but somehow much stronger, definitely far steadier. He remembers where those hands were that night. His brain latches onto the memory, wanting more than pain and sadness.
He can’t, it’s such a bad idea, he wants to pull back and run the way he always does. But the memory unfurls further, lips on his, tracing his neck, leaving a hot bruise. He struggles to swallow the lump in his throat. Cater’s so close, Idia thinks he smells soap and shampoo over the scent of coffee, he remembers burying his fingers in copper-bright hair with the same fragrance.
Something stirs, and Idia suddenly whimpers, slamming his eyes shut. Pink winds through the green fire, some cherry blossom pale and some as bright as dragonfruit, almost red.]
[Cater can't pretend to fully understand what the different colors of Idia's changing flames mean...but he can make some pretty educated guesses based on context clues alone. And he remembered, vividly, the last time he saw Idia's hair turn this color.
And he thinks, for what feels like the millionth time, about Idia's Sleepr entry--and his conversation with Natsume on that post. He squeezes Idia's hand just a bit more tightly, anticipating that what he has to say next might really make Idia want to bolt. But his voice is more gentle than ever.]
I wouldn't laugh at you, if you told me you still think about what happened at the party in December.
[No no no, why is Cater talking like that, so gentle and soft? Something about it zips right down Idia’s spine and raises goosebumps on his arms. It’s almost the same tone he spoke close to Idia’s ear when he asked if they should stop. A little more breathy and it would break him.
The party… he can’t stop thinking about it, waking moments looping back into the dream. Does Cater realize what he’s doing to Idia? Is this what he wants? There’s no shortage of those who want Cater, why should he waste a moment on a bitter, sad, lonely nerd? The reactions he struggled to curb return without a care for his mortification, and as much as he wants to flee he knows he’ll only give everything away if he tries.
[It should have been flattering, to hear someone say that they dreamed about him. To hear Idia say it. And it still was, he supposed, in a sense. But...it was just tragic, too, how broken up he was about it. How desperate he sounded to not be dreaming of him. Like Cater Diamond was a curse on his brain.
Well, clearly, trying to banish him from his subconscious mind wasn't working. The only other thing that made sense to him was to try the opposite: to get him out of his system. Surely, once he actually had him, he'd be satisfied, right? Because no matter what Idia's body wanted, he didn't like him. This was just some repressed physical need that Cater had unlocked. It only made sense that he step up and take responsibility.]
[The moment the words left his mouth, Idia’s face had gone hot. Cater’s casual answer only made it worse. The creeping dread that Cater could see through the table, see Idia’s shameful lack of control, twisted his insides. He wants to yank his hand away, but his body won’t listen, as if it too is tired of them dancing around each other.
He squeezes his thin thighs together, trying to will his unruly libido to chill. It’s not like they could get further than what happened at the party, once Cater got a good look at Idia’s body he’d drop an excuse and GTFO as fast as possible. Nobody could want someone who looks like this.]
… I… I can’t… n— nobody could stomach seeing me n— n— na…
[Cater takes a breath, searching for Idia's other hand, to take both of them in his own and draw his full attention. To try and break through all that static of self-loathing.]
I understand why you wouldn't believe me, but you could really look like absolutely anything and I'd still be just as interested. You're not going to scare me off.
[Not fair, touching both of his hands. Some primitive part of his brain is yelling YES while his rational side agonizes. All this time keeping Cater at a distance, and now it’s crashing down because of mind-altering spells and stupid lingering hormones?]
Y— you’ve got that guy… could have anybody you want… don’t… don’t do this to yourself… don’t have to pretend….
[Why else would Cater be interested in him? He wouldn’t, that’s the answer. This… it has to be pity. Idia doesn’t think Cater’s shallow enough to consider him a conquest. Though if he’s wrong, does it matter?]
[He can’t look. He just… can’t. If he looks, it will be real and he’ll crumble. He’s scared if he goes through with it, he’ll be admitting to something he’s been denying. He’s terrified he’ll enjoy it.]
… don’t know… w— what I’m doing…
[He brags about otome games and knowing the best routes, but this hasn’t been anything like those. He’s lost and helpless. What if he regrets it? What if things become even more awkward?]
[That was never a problem. Cater knew enough for the both of them. Knew all about staving off loneliness with physical escape. So he leans in closer, his voice dropping to a whisper.]
[That whisper and those words go right to Idia’s core. What a dirty move. If Cater keeps this up they’re going to be fooling around on Vil’s kitchen table because Idia won’t want to walk. So he bites his lip and relents with a small nod, hoping this actually brings him some peace of mind. Whatever Cater wants from him in exchange is worth sleeping without those dreams.
His flames are mostly red now, shot with pink. The sickly green has completely faded. Even his eyebrows and the bluish color of his lips and eyelids have shifted, making him look like he’s wearing Heartslabyul’s red eyeliner and rose lipstick.]
[That question earns a slight quirk of Cater's lips. He stands, pulling up Idia with him, whether he liked it or not.]
My room. C'mon.
[He didn't know how far they'd actually be going, here, but...if they wanted to be prepared, that was the best place. Besides, if it didn't go well, better that Idia was able to retreat to a safe, untainted space. So long as Idia doesn't protest, Cater will lead him by the hand all the way to his bedroom and lock the door behind them.]
[Idia hesitates to get up but eventually does, revealing what he was trying to hide: the start of a noticeable bulge in his sweatpants. He avoids Cater’s eyes, red to the tips of his ears. Since when did he become so easy to turn on?? He’s fully expecting a laugh or a sly remark as he shuffles awkwardly along.
The door closing behind them has him jumping slightly, the click of the lock making him gulp. He’s shaking, his free arm wrapping around his chest protectively, but he doesn’t try to pry his other hand away.]
[He does notice, of course--there's no real way not to. But Cater, gentleman that he is, doesn't so much as let his eyes linger. There would be plenty of time for that shortly, anyway. Once they're guaranteed their privacy, Cater pivots his body toward Idia once again and considers him. If this went anything like last time, this would probably escalate surprisingly quickly...but then, Idia wasn't on any kind of inhibition-lowering substance, this time. Cater wasn't totally sure what he should expect.
Either way, Idia looked like he might fall over unexpectedly at any point, so Cater guides him over to the bed and encourages him to sit down beside him, knocking their knees together.]
If you need to stop, I don't want you to forget that you can say so at any time, okay? I won't feel badly about it.
[Stop? He doesn't want to start. Not really. Well, maybe not. He doesn't know. How did he end up here, like this? He's scared of this unknown and what it could do, but existing in this limbo is tearing him apart. Losing his temper in the hall proved that much, when before he could've simply run away and not had dreams that left him a mess physically and mentally.
Sitting on Cater's bed feels surreal, his pulse frantic from the thought that he's going to end up stretched out naked here soon. Will Cater count his ribs, the bumps in his spine? Will he gauge the depth of the hollows of Idia's collar bones? Will there be disgust in his eyes as he tests if his finger and thumb can completely encircle a wrist or a even a bicep? How can Idia's flesh be aching for this so much when there's so little of it?
He doesn't know what to say and still doesn't trust his voice, so he simply nods again. Sitting down means he can squeeze his legs together again, draping one hand over the embarrassing evidence in his lap as if trying to hide it. He wishes he could yell at it and make it stop doing that forever.]
[Cater expected, of course, that he'd be leading this whole thing, but watching Idia sit beside him looking so miserable made him doubt if this wasn't wrong of him. If it wouldn't somehow make things worse when it didn't really feel like things could get worse.
For now, he doesn't pressure Idia to stop hiding himself and his natural physical reactions. He just makes a decision for the both of them, to start where they'd left off before. Without saying anything else, Cater slides a hand around to the back of Idia's neck to pull him gently in toward him and meets him halfway, pressing their lips gently together.]
12/25 Gift Delivery
Date: 2024-12-27 12:47 am (UTC)A tin of sweets (which may or may not be regifted) is waiting with a piece of paper attached that's been cut out to look like a classic ticket voucher. It reads: To be Exchanged for One Day at Appl3 Pi Arcade Courtesy of Cater Diamond (who will pay for all expenses but not force his company upon recipient).]
NSFW PRIVATE IN PERSON THREAD - BEFORE START OF APRIL 2025 EVENT
Date: 2025-04-16 10:55 pm (UTC)So instead he retreats to the kitchen in the middle of the night (after waiting for his heart and other things to settle down) for coffee. He’s absolutely not going back to sleep no matter how much Vil might scold him for needing more rest. Hunched over the table with both hands cupped around the mug, he stares blankly at the steam rising from the too-sweet dark brew.
Why him? He doesn’t need something so trivial, no matter how he felt under the spell of sorcerous sugar. It’s an awful distraction, and with that person of all possible candidates? He’s fully certain this is his personal hell. It’s not like he can ask for advice or, worse yet, relief from the dream’s effects. Even if sating this bizarre curiosity works, how could he face him or anyone else in the house ever again? It’s stupid! He’s stupid for even considering it!
Groaning, Idia slides the mug away and lets his forehead thump onto the table. What more could possibly go wrong with his brain and body?]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 02:20 am (UTC)It was hard not to, when they lived under the same roof. When Cater was aware of just how deliberately they'd been avoiding each other, since that blowup in the hallway.
When the smell of coffee reaches his room, Cater knows who it has to be. Anyone else and Vil wouldn't tolerate the ill-advised caffeine consumption. He knows it would probably be for the best to leave it, to pretend that he has no idea Idia's out and about in the middle of the night...but something tugs him out of bed, anyway. Cater shuffles toward the kitchen like a man possessed, standing for a long moment in the doorway as he watches where Idia sits.
The way the other boy's head was resting against the table, he could easily turn back around without being found out. And he wondered, even now, if making himself known would do more harm than good. But...they couldn't keep dancing around this, right? Not when Cater knew for a fact that Idia was thinking about him. So, steeling himself, he clears his throat to alert Idia to his presence, approaching the table.]
Looks like a recipe for getting no sleep. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you had an all-night dungeon crawl planned.
[Though it's an amicable opening, Cater doesn't put on a false air of cheer. No, he's notably subdued, his arms crossed somewhat defensively in front of his chest.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 02:56 am (UTC)Instead, his startled look gradually melts into a much more exhausted one. He shakes his head slowly, drawing the mug closer again to stare into it.]
I’d give anything for a console or computer.
[Maybe that’s why his stupid brain is losing it, he only gets to play at the arcade and sometimes it’s too crowded for him. He misses building and coding too. Sighing, he takes a long swallow of coffee.]
I’ll be outta your way as soon as I finish this.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 03:01 am (UTC)[Cater sighs, pulling up a chair at the table. Seriously, he knew Idia was like this, but it was so tiring, to feel like his presence was an active detriment. Even if Idia didn't mean it that way...but honestly, at this point, Cater really didn't know.
So, screw it. He's just gonna ask, point blank.]
What do you think of me?
[He leans back in his seat, watching Idia closely, as if expecting he'll have to use some kind of magic to keep him from turning cat and bolting.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 03:08 am (UTC)And then the question comes, bringing with it crackling and spitting sparks, like wet wood in a campfire. Idia looks suddenly queasy.]
Wh— what? I… I don’t…
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 03:15 am (UTC)I'm having a really hard time understanding if you resent me or if you actually want me to be spending time with you. I thought it was the former, so I've been trying to respect your space, but I'm really getting mixed signals. I know communication isn't your strong suit but I can't, like...it's stressful, not knowing where I stand with your or what the right way forward is, to make things better. Nothing's going to get any less awkward if you don't tell me what you're thinking.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 03:32 am (UTC)Why is this happening now, right after one of those dreams? Did… did Cater hear him one of those nights? Did he know what Idia was doing?? Oh Seven… if that’s what this is about, Idia’s going to die on the spot. Or did somebody tell Cater that he nearly managed to Overblot again even without his magic?
He’s spiraling, this could be from any number of things! Even if it really is only because Idia’s been avoiding him, why bring it up now, when that’s how things were for three years back at NRC?? Is it sharing a smaller house instead of two different dorms? Does Idia need to leave? But Vil will be upset, for some reason the man is protective of him….
Idia hasn’t answered, but the level of internal conflict is blatantly obvious in his features. The increasing green hue of his flames gives his pale skin an even more sickly look. His thoughts flash back to that encounter in the hall, the terrible squeezing pain in his chest and the need to escape clashing against something he doesn’t understand. He shakes his head, not an answer but simply because he’s not sure what to say.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 03:39 am (UTC)Hey.
[This wasn't working, though, and Cater didn't really know how to try and bring Idia any sort of peace. The usual ways that his charm worked just didn't with Idia. But he can't just sit here staring at him, and he's determined not to leave him alone about this until he has no choice. So, he scoots their chairs a bit closer, and even as he anticipates getting flinched away from, he puts one of his hands on Idia's. Compared to those long, bony fingers, his own skin is soft and warm--even with the mild callouses from his guitar playing.]
No judgment, okay? I promise. Even if you don't have anything coherent banging around in that brilliant brain of yours, anywhere's a good place to start.
[Because clearly, clearly, it wasn't nothing.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:06 am (UTC)He can’t, it’s such a bad idea, he wants to pull back and run the way he always does. But the memory unfurls further, lips on his, tracing his neck, leaving a hot bruise. He struggles to swallow the lump in his throat. Cater’s so close, Idia thinks he smells soap and shampoo over the scent of coffee, he remembers burying his fingers in copper-bright hair with the same fragrance.
Something stirs, and Idia suddenly whimpers, slamming his eyes shut. Pink winds through the green fire, some cherry blossom pale and some as bright as dragonfruit, almost red.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:22 am (UTC)And he thinks, for what feels like the millionth time, about Idia's Sleepr entry--and his conversation with Natsume on that post. He squeezes Idia's hand just a bit more tightly, anticipating that what he has to say next might really make Idia want to bolt. But his voice is more gentle than ever.]
I wouldn't laugh at you, if you told me you still think about what happened at the party in December.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:35 am (UTC)The party… he can’t stop thinking about it, waking moments looping back into the dream. Does Cater realize what he’s doing to Idia? Is this what he wants? There’s no shortage of those who want Cater, why should he waste a moment on a bitter, sad, lonely nerd? The reactions he struggled to curb return without a care for his mortification, and as much as he wants to flee he knows he’ll only give everything away if he tries.
And then his mouth betrays him anyway.]
I— I can’t stop the dreams…!
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:40 am (UTC)Well, clearly, trying to banish him from his subconscious mind wasn't working. The only other thing that made sense to him was to try the opposite: to get him out of his system. Surely, once he actually had him, he'd be satisfied, right? Because no matter what Idia's body wanted, he didn't like him. This was just some repressed physical need that Cater had unlocked. It only made sense that he step up and take responsibility.]
So...don't let them be dreams.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 04:52 am (UTC)He squeezes his thin thighs together, trying to will his unruly libido to chill. It’s not like they could get further than what happened at the party, once Cater got a good look at Idia’s body he’d drop an excuse and GTFO as fast as possible. Nobody could want someone who looks like this.]
… I… I can’t… n— nobody could stomach seeing me n— n— na…
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:00 am (UTC)[Cater takes a breath, searching for Idia's other hand, to take both of them in his own and draw his full attention. To try and break through all that static of self-loathing.]
I understand why you wouldn't believe me, but you could really look like absolutely anything and I'd still be just as interested. You're not going to scare me off.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:09 am (UTC)Y— you’ve got that guy… could have anybody you want… don’t… don’t do this to yourself… don’t have to pretend….
[Why else would Cater be interested in him? He wouldn’t, that’s the answer. This… it has to be pity. Idia doesn’t think Cater’s shallow enough to consider him a conquest. Though if he’s wrong, does it matter?]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:13 am (UTC)You are giving me way too much credit. I'm not some mega celebrity or prince. I'm just a guy. But just--look at me.
[He shifts to try and put himself directly in Idia's dodging line of sight.]
Do I really look like I'm pretending, right now?
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:24 am (UTC)… don’t know… w— what I’m doing…
[He brags about otome games and knowing the best routes, but this hasn’t been anything like those. He’s lost and helpless. What if he regrets it? What if things become even more awkward?]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:31 am (UTC)[That was never a problem. Cater knew enough for the both of them. Knew all about staving off loneliness with physical escape. So he leans in closer, his voice dropping to a whisper.]
You just need to give yourself permission.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:42 am (UTC)His flames are mostly red now, shot with pink. The sickly green has completely faded. Even his eyebrows and the bluish color of his lips and eyelids have shifted, making him look like he’s wearing Heartslabyul’s red eyeliner and rose lipstick.]
… Wh— where…?
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:49 am (UTC)My room. C'mon.
[He didn't know how far they'd actually be going, here, but...if they wanted to be prepared, that was the best place. Besides, if it didn't go well, better that Idia was able to retreat to a safe, untainted space. So long as Idia doesn't protest, Cater will lead him by the hand all the way to his bedroom and lock the door behind them.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 05:57 am (UTC)The door closing behind them has him jumping slightly, the click of the lock making him gulp. He’s shaking, his free arm wrapping around his chest protectively, but he doesn’t try to pry his other hand away.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-17 07:46 am (UTC)Either way, Idia looked like he might fall over unexpectedly at any point, so Cater guides him over to the bed and encourages him to sit down beside him, knocking their knees together.]
If you need to stop, I don't want you to forget that you can say so at any time, okay? I won't feel badly about it.
cw: body image issues
Date: 2025-04-17 03:12 pm (UTC)Sitting on Cater's bed feels surreal, his pulse frantic from the thought that he's going to end up stretched out naked here soon. Will Cater count his ribs, the bumps in his spine? Will he gauge the depth of the hollows of Idia's collar bones? Will there be disgust in his eyes as he tests if his finger and thumb can completely encircle a wrist or a even a bicep? How can Idia's flesh be aching for this so much when there's so little of it?
He doesn't know what to say and still doesn't trust his voice, so he simply nods again. Sitting down means he can squeeze his legs together again, draping one hand over the embarrassing evidence in his lap as if trying to hide it. He wishes he could yell at it and make it stop doing that forever.]
no subject
Date: 2025-04-18 12:19 am (UTC)For now, he doesn't pressure Idia to stop hiding himself and his natural physical reactions. He just makes a decision for the both of them, to start where they'd left off before. Without saying anything else, Cater slides a hand around to the back of Idia's neck to pull him gently in toward him and meets him halfway, pressing their lips gently together.]
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From:(Thank you canon for giving us Big Hands Idia & society for the stereotype XD)
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